errrrr......resignation is excited until he said "I cannot stop u." though it's not the 1st sentece from his mouth after I passed him the resignation letter.
I know I have cheated him a bit. I told him that I don't like my current job scope. So he asked me to give it more time & who knows I might love it later. Boss, I have been cheated once by you and I don't think you will let me choose anymore, I trusted u no more. The way you cheat is too advanced, you used so many reasons, I am really defeated.
He also asked me to give him a date to review my preference again. I said the end of the 1st quarter of 2011 but in fact I had started to look for new job. But now thinking back, he wasn't being totally frank as well although he might have his own concern by that time. The fact is he knew re-organization will happen and I might not be reporting to him anymore. So will review with me when re-org had happened? Isn't that a cheat to me too?
Ahh....I felt so lucky as I run fast enough while the re-organization is happening. In the meeting of announcing re-org of our group, I felt so hopeless if I was to stay in the same department as I see no bright future for myself to grow. The super big boss kept asking us to ask more question but not many people did. Actually, Big Boss, I wanted to tell you something, there's no use to ask more as you left no choice for us, we can't object even if we hate the change.
I didn't plan to resign so soon after I signed the offer letter from new company. But the re-org thing has made my teamate kept asking me what's my plan. And a frank people like me (sorry, being thick face here :P) couldn't help but to tell him the truth. And I wanted to be fair to my boss, I want him to hear from me instead of others, so I quickly set a 1:1 with him on the next day. It's actually a relieve to tell a secret-to-be-unsealed. It's so hard to keep something inside my heart which I know one day I have to tell.
A lot of people are leaving during Dec and the coming Jan, plus the re-org thing, my news of leaving is getting harder to hide especially after the news of KS is leaving in two weeks after throwing the resignation letter bursted out. She is super duple geng as so far I haven't seen anyone can leave in such a short time.
I still have a lot more stories to tell, but u know what? It's late now but tomorrow is holiday.....yeah, Yippie!!!!!
and I still need to go back to office to work like a cow ..... yeah, hurray!!! A big hand for me!!! (*just wanna be sarcarstic)
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Monday, December 6, 2010
the life before a new life
hmm...again, i am back after a long time. Recently I have a lot of thoughts and started to think of making this blog as my own diary. I guess it's qutie safe as no one will read it.
This time I wanted to record how my life is before I start my new life in an island/country which I have never stepped on--Singapore.
But before that, I want to describe a bit of how I came to that decision. I was actually always asking myself was I really having the right job for myself? Did I really put myself in the right place? Was I really the right one in this position? I always suspect whether I was suitable to the job or whether the job is suitable for me. But, I tried to give many reason to convince myself that may be I was just not adapted to the new environment and I will be better if I give myself more time. I asked myself to appreciate everything I have and don't complain.
Until one day, when my job scope started to change & the workload was so heavy until I needed to work late (almost) every working day. I was like a dead body everyday after work and had not personal life at all. It's so serious until I had to pause my piano lesson for two months. Sometimes, my tears bursted out and could wait no long enough for me to step into my car after I walked out of office. The1st time it happened, I was actually shocked as it's so unexpectedly, so uncontrolled and unstoppable! I was not afraid of anyone to see me in that condition as it's late, the sky was dark and the car park was so empty. I felt so sorry that my car had to wait for me until the sun passes the shift to the moon. It's such an unhealthy work style that engineers working hours are overlapping with the night-shifts-technicians working hours EVERYDAY. Do I deserve it? Although I am not the only one, but do we deserve it? May be they think worth it, but I really don't think it worths anything. My life became so miserable and I started to complain, and there're two experienced engineers gave me some advices. This time I was seriously considering the option that I always rejected i.e. to find a new job. As a start, I wanted to play safe, so I decided to find an internal job and started to ask around underground. But soon I realize, it's actually tougher to find internally and job in another company will be better choice as I could get better pay in that way too :P
So during the hectic life, I stole some times to ask favors from friends, use job street, prepare resume, prepare documents for interview, and started my life of waiting calls for interviews, took leave to attend interviews...etc.
One day, a friend who is working in S'pore came to visit my housemates and bring a news that her team is looking for new hires. And Walahhh! I got the offer after she sent my resume and after I attended 3 phone interviews. In the meantime, an job offer from A* came to me almost at the same thime. I did think and think and think and think(got the details of offer from A* on 3Nov, G* on 4Nov).........and finally I follow my heart -- go to explore while I am still "young" :P
I replied G* and rejected A* (on 8Nov). Surprsingly HR from A* called me again and request me to re-consider the offer with the pursuation that they will consider to increase my salary if I accept. Hmmm....my heart did shake awhile as the offer is indeed very interesting even without the further increment but still the urge of going to adventure is greater.
Plus, I can take this chance to leave the house I stay now and the housemates I have currently. Why? Will tell in my blog one day if I remember. heheh....
But there's one thing makes me so uncertain of my decision. How am I going to continue the pursue of my piano dream? Finally I told myself that "there's a will, there's a way!" I believe I will find a way to solve it there.
So I made my mind to make a big change and ended approximately two months of job hunting! I have never own any passport, never gone to oversea. A kampung girl finally decided to explore the world out of her comfort zone! I know I will have home sick there, hopefully there'll be medicine to cure the sickness.Hmmm.....
oh ya.................now, although after the resignation, my miserable working life hasn't stopped although it's much better than the previous intensive "work-late-life".
This time I wanted to record how my life is before I start my new life in an island/country which I have never stepped on--Singapore.
But before that, I want to describe a bit of how I came to that decision. I was actually always asking myself was I really having the right job for myself? Did I really put myself in the right place? Was I really the right one in this position? I always suspect whether I was suitable to the job or whether the job is suitable for me. But, I tried to give many reason to convince myself that may be I was just not adapted to the new environment and I will be better if I give myself more time. I asked myself to appreciate everything I have and don't complain.
Until one day, when my job scope started to change & the workload was so heavy until I needed to work late (almost) every working day. I was like a dead body everyday after work and had not personal life at all. It's so serious until I had to pause my piano lesson for two months. Sometimes, my tears bursted out and could wait no long enough for me to step into my car after I walked out of office. The1st time it happened, I was actually shocked as it's so unexpectedly, so uncontrolled and unstoppable! I was not afraid of anyone to see me in that condition as it's late, the sky was dark and the car park was so empty. I felt so sorry that my car had to wait for me until the sun passes the shift to the moon. It's such an unhealthy work style that engineers working hours are overlapping with the night-shifts-technicians working hours EVERYDAY. Do I deserve it? Although I am not the only one, but do we deserve it? May be they think worth it, but I really don't think it worths anything. My life became so miserable and I started to complain, and there're two experienced engineers gave me some advices. This time I was seriously considering the option that I always rejected i.e. to find a new job. As a start, I wanted to play safe, so I decided to find an internal job and started to ask around underground. But soon I realize, it's actually tougher to find internally and job in another company will be better choice as I could get better pay in that way too :P
So during the hectic life, I stole some times to ask favors from friends, use job street, prepare resume, prepare documents for interview, and started my life of waiting calls for interviews, took leave to attend interviews...etc.
One day, a friend who is working in S'pore came to visit my housemates and bring a news that her team is looking for new hires. And Walahhh! I got the offer after she sent my resume and after I attended 3 phone interviews. In the meantime, an job offer from A* came to me almost at the same thime. I did think and think and think and think(got the details of offer from A* on 3Nov, G* on 4Nov).........and finally I follow my heart -- go to explore while I am still "young" :P
I replied G* and rejected A* (on 8Nov). Surprsingly HR from A* called me again and request me to re-consider the offer with the pursuation that they will consider to increase my salary if I accept. Hmmm....my heart did shake awhile as the offer is indeed very interesting even without the further increment but still the urge of going to adventure is greater.
Plus, I can take this chance to leave the house I stay now and the housemates I have currently. Why? Will tell in my blog one day if I remember. heheh....
But there's one thing makes me so uncertain of my decision. How am I going to continue the pursue of my piano dream? Finally I told myself that "there's a will, there's a way!" I believe I will find a way to solve it there.
So I made my mind to make a big change and ended approximately two months of job hunting! I have never own any passport, never gone to oversea. A kampung girl finally decided to explore the world out of her comfort zone! I know I will have home sick there, hopefully there'll be medicine to cure the sickness.Hmmm.....
oh ya.................now, although after the resignation, my miserable working life hasn't stopped although it's much better than the previous intensive "work-late-life".
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
I screwed up
What happened to me recently? I have screwed up a lot of things. Last week I got the "last warning" from PBA (Perbadanan Bekalan Air Pulau Pinang) as we didn't pay the bill last month. I am so fed up as I was thinking why they can't send a soft warning before the last warning? Sometimes people can be forgetful, how can they be so unconsiderate? I think I am more fed up with myself, how can I forget the pay the bill but still remember to collect the payment from housemates? Luckily one of my housemate is good enough to help me to go the counter to pay (no choice, HAVE to go to counter).
Next, I donate some money to World Vision but forgot to print screen the transaction slip. After that only I realise I didn't see the instruction properly, without the print screen, they will consider the donation is from anonymous. SO SAD! All I want is just the picture folder of the child and his/her details! Why am I being so careless?
The new thing that I screwed up happened to my working environment. I talked something to big boss, big boss misunderstand, then my boss come to talk to me. I try to explain, though we clarify the misunderstand, but still it doesn't solve my problem. I am still having the same problem after going such a big circle. Aikss.......may be I am just an unmature kid who is shouting "I wannt grow up!". Why can't I express myself well? Why can't I do what I like to do? Why can't I like what I do? Why do have to think so much? Does thinking much help to solve problem or create disaster? ah.......................once again, I wanna escape!
Next, I donate some money to World Vision but forgot to print screen the transaction slip. After that only I realise I didn't see the instruction properly, without the print screen, they will consider the donation is from anonymous. SO SAD! All I want is just the picture folder of the child and his/her details! Why am I being so careless?
The new thing that I screwed up happened to my working environment. I talked something to big boss, big boss misunderstand, then my boss come to talk to me. I try to explain, though we clarify the misunderstand, but still it doesn't solve my problem. I am still having the same problem after going such a big circle. Aikss.......may be I am just an unmature kid who is shouting "I wannt grow up!". Why can't I express myself well? Why can't I do what I like to do? Why can't I like what I do? Why do have to think so much? Does thinking much help to solve problem or create disaster? ah.......................once again, I wanna escape!
Sunday, April 4, 2010
I broke my own record!
2/4-3/4(fri-sat) were definitely two memorable days for me as I have broken the record of longest non-sleeping time & longest OT time, hahah...
On thursday, they said 1st Si would arrive at 9pm Friday night, so the team don't need to go to work at the day time. Thanks to EY for helping me to request the eligibilty to claim OT. But who knows on Friday morning when I was still sleeping, an sms was sent to me saying the Si would arrive at 11am so we need to be ready. With no choice, took a bath hurrily while my housemates was still preparing to depart. Again, who knows the Si was pushed out again to the night 10pm, so we need to go back to rest after lunch time.
But I had so much stuff to do that I was kind of reluctant to go back until others were urging me to go back then only I was willing to leave. But pity me, I couldn't get into sleep at all while I was lying on the bed for 3 hours. I blamed myself for taking the two cups of coffee thinking that it will be a long day to debug from morning, sigh....
What to do then? Washed clothes which were piling up since many days ago, yaks.....dirty & lazy girl huh...
Then went to work at 6pm wishing to get more stuff done, but as usual, no much gain from there. Went to standby at 10pm & wait until abt 12am++ then started our battle, a long battle....until abt 5am. God, we need to continue another battle at 8am. So thinking there's no point to go home for a few hours only, it'd be better idea to do other stuffs while waiting during those few hours.
After 8am, we started to standby again & finally we were done abt 11am. See, I have broken my own record of the longest working hours. Wao, that's certainly amazed myself if not others, hahah....
Went home straight away after finish work & slept like dead until 3pm++ when my housemates' sound in the living room has waken me up. So I forced myself to be awake since I was going to have my very 1st piano lesson at 4.30pm after I stopped learning piano for so many years. The tireness had covered my excitement for 1st lesson. After the lesson, I continue sleeping like nothing has happened until the morning of the next day which was this morning. While taking my breakfast this morning only I realised I didn't have my lunch & dinner yesterday!! Wao! Almost break my last record of 30hours, haha!
And here I am, for the 1st time I am working on Sunday (even though I did come to office for a couple of hours to work on Saturday). But this time, I am seriously OT'ing....
Ahh...........I wish I could eat something delicious & sleep very well now, and also play piano non-stop without bothering my housemates, wakakkakaka
I have lost my weekend :(
Can I have pleaseful weekdays without any sign of hectic? But what to do? May be my manager think that I have 8 hands instead of 2 :P
P/S: I know this blog is too wordy but I just can't help.
On thursday, they said 1st Si would arrive at 9pm Friday night, so the team don't need to go to work at the day time. Thanks to EY for helping me to request the eligibilty to claim OT. But who knows on Friday morning when I was still sleeping, an sms was sent to me saying the Si would arrive at 11am so we need to be ready. With no choice, took a bath hurrily while my housemates was still preparing to depart. Again, who knows the Si was pushed out again to the night 10pm, so we need to go back to rest after lunch time.
But I had so much stuff to do that I was kind of reluctant to go back until others were urging me to go back then only I was willing to leave. But pity me, I couldn't get into sleep at all while I was lying on the bed for 3 hours. I blamed myself for taking the two cups of coffee thinking that it will be a long day to debug from morning, sigh....
What to do then? Washed clothes which were piling up since many days ago, yaks.....dirty & lazy girl huh...
Then went to work at 6pm wishing to get more stuff done, but as usual, no much gain from there. Went to standby at 10pm & wait until abt 12am++ then started our battle, a long battle....until abt 5am. God, we need to continue another battle at 8am. So thinking there's no point to go home for a few hours only, it'd be better idea to do other stuffs while waiting during those few hours.
After 8am, we started to standby again & finally we were done abt 11am. See, I have broken my own record of the longest working hours. Wao, that's certainly amazed myself if not others, hahah....
Went home straight away after finish work & slept like dead until 3pm++ when my housemates' sound in the living room has waken me up. So I forced myself to be awake since I was going to have my very 1st piano lesson at 4.30pm after I stopped learning piano for so many years. The tireness had covered my excitement for 1st lesson. After the lesson, I continue sleeping like nothing has happened until the morning of the next day which was this morning. While taking my breakfast this morning only I realised I didn't have my lunch & dinner yesterday!! Wao! Almost break my last record of 30hours, haha!
And here I am, for the 1st time I am working on Sunday (even though I did come to office for a couple of hours to work on Saturday). But this time, I am seriously OT'ing....
Ahh...........I wish I could eat something delicious & sleep very well now, and also play piano non-stop without bothering my housemates, wakakkakaka
I have lost my weekend :(
Can I have pleaseful weekdays without any sign of hectic? But what to do? May be my manager think that I have 8 hands instead of 2 :P
P/S: I know this blog is too wordy but I just can't help.
Friday, March 26, 2010
我有点过分
他病了，我又心痛了。
可是为什么要为他操心啊？我有什么资格为他心疼啊？在他眼里，我只不过是在办公室里坐他毗邻的普通朋友而已。我算什么啊！
曾经天真地以为我们可以无所不谈，如今除了讥嫌我，他连一句bye bye都懒得跟我说。他非得那么残忍吗？我也必须狠下心，明知他病了也不可以表现出任何一丝关心。
我也病了，心病了。他不知道我的心在痛！我知道越是在乎他，我会越难过。所以我很努力地医自己，很努力地放下他，很努力地逼自己借以工作来戒掉他。
我知道我过分，为了一个没有血缘关系的人担心，却没花多点心思在家人身上。原谅我，我在努力地改着了。
可是为什么要为他操心啊？我有什么资格为他心疼啊？在他眼里，我只不过是在办公室里坐他毗邻的普通朋友而已。我算什么啊！
曾经天真地以为我们可以无所不谈，如今除了讥嫌我，他连一句bye bye都懒得跟我说。他非得那么残忍吗？我也必须狠下心，明知他病了也不可以表现出任何一丝关心。
我也病了，心病了。他不知道我的心在痛！我知道越是在乎他，我会越难过。所以我很努力地医自己，很努力地放下他，很努力地逼自己借以工作来戒掉他。
我知道我过分，为了一个没有血缘关系的人担心，却没花多点心思在家人身上。原谅我，我在努力地改着了。
Sunday, March 21, 2010
Alice in Wonderland
I watched "Alice in Wonderland" yesterday, I like the craziness & creativity of the story. Wished to watch 3D in the 1st place but I didn't get a chance to do so as it's been fully booked.
I like the determinism of Alice, she was very very determined when she told the dog (I forget what its name is) that she is the one who makes her own path. She was so confident & believed in herself so much when she was saying that. I like the image of her at the last sceen which gave me a feeling of successful woman who doesn't need to live as others expected us so, who can be independent without husband/boyfriend.
I also observed her dresses from the first sceen to the last. The one which looks the best is the one which she wore when she was in the Underland (is that the name of the place where the Red Queen lived?), where Alice was being called as "Um". Hahahaha, what a funny name.
I like the determinism of Alice, she was very very determined when she told the dog (I forget what its name is) that she is the one who makes her own path. She was so confident & believed in herself so much when she was saying that. I like the image of her at the last sceen which gave me a feeling of successful woman who doesn't need to live as others expected us so, who can be independent without husband/boyfriend.
I also observed her dresses from the first sceen to the last. The one which looks the best is the one which she wore when she was in the Underland (is that the name of the place where the Red Queen lived?), where Alice was being called as "Um". Hahahaha, what a funny name.
This is the day it's back to me
Just wanna leave a trace here to remind myself that my baby is back to me today- 21st March, 2010. Long time no play ya...
The process of moving it was kind of smooth, it fit just nice into the lift and it didn't gave much hardness for us to send it to 12th floor :)
Thanks to the uncle & the Indian guy who can speak Mandarin so well, for helping to me move the piano all the way from my hometown to here.
Baby, please stay well with us. It's too bad to know that one of the components inside you is broken, but I still love you as much as I used to. Although I did think to buy a better piano than you previously :P
The process of moving it was kind of smooth, it fit just nice into the lift and it didn't gave much hardness for us to send it to 12th floor :)
Thanks to the uncle & the Indian guy who can speak Mandarin so well, for helping to me move the piano all the way from my hometown to here.
Baby, please stay well with us. It's too bad to know that one of the components inside you is broken, but I still love you as much as I used to. Although I did think to buy a better piano than you previously :P
Friday, March 19, 2010
Found it!
I thought I will never have a chance to write on this blog again because I can't remember the account name & password :P
I accidentally get back to this blog when I was trying to leave a comment on my sister's blog, haha...
May be I should write more often with interesting story, but will my life ever be interesting? I guess I should try to write stories of others instead of mine.
I accidentally get back to this blog when I was trying to leave a comment on my sister's blog, haha...
May be I should write more often with interesting story, but will my life ever be interesting? I guess I should try to write stories of others instead of mine.
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